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07 Jul 2022
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07 Jul 2022
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10 things that happen in every Irish household over Christmas
The tree lights won't co-operate...
Frustration will boil over before the big day has even arrived. The lights from last year won't work, and whoever's job it is to fix them will slowly lose the will to live. 'JUST BUY NEW ONES.'
Something will be forgotten in the shops...
'I forgot the Jaysus Baileys cream'...I'll be shot. Go! Go! Go!
The rush for mass...
Your poor mother will lay an egg if you're all late for mass and have to storm in midway through the opening reflection. The mortification of it!
Sprouts will cause ructions...
'How do you know you don't like them if you don't try them?' No matter how much bacon and nuts and garlic you throw on a sprout, no one will eat them!
Someone will get shafted to swap their Curly Wurly for a Fudge...
Why would anyone in their right mind agree to that deal during the inevitable selection box bartering? Mindless carry on!
Your mother will fall asleep...
The big day and dinner takes its toll on your poor mother. 'Ah jaysus, she'll miss the Mrs Brown Christmas Special now, she loves that.'
A civil war will break out over the washing up...
You can't wake your mother and someone has to tackle the mountain of plates. Your father will drop the bombshell and trigger World War III.
Someone will leave the wrappers in the Roses tin...
The one thing that could actually derail Christmas. Someone in the house has no common decency whatsoever.
The 'games' will get way too competitive...
'Look, your granny added up the scores wrong - it's only a game.'
'Visitors' will strike fear into your mother's heart...
'Was that a knock at that door?' - Jesus Christ, I don't have enough drink, what if someone asks for a Sherry, I don't buy Sherry.
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