It’s a dog’s life for this candidate

Ed Hund, dogged on the trail.
An unusual election poster erected in Kilcock recently sent the Leader sniffing around for answers.

An unusual election poster erected in Kilcock recently sent the Leader sniffing around for answers.

Edvard Hund, a handsome looking mutt, was pictured on a town centre pole along with shots of Tim Durkan and Martin Grehan.

Not wanting to cock the Leader leg at an important pillar of society we barked at the internet e-mail.

Questions arose. Had this candidate a leg to stand on? What teeth had they to show?

Was this lad or lass of eligible age to stand in the Maynooth Clane area this Friday?

Ed barked back. “Firstly may I commend you on your bravery in making contact with a Gurrier Terrier by email... that took guts, kid.”

My tail wagged with delight.

Ed continued: “My sister gave birth in the street to five lovely pups this time last year. She got done for littering in public, which just wasn’t fair, and probably got me started in politics. My manifesto includes more transparent pricing policy on pet foods in supermarket multiples.

“Cat food consistently gets better shelf coverage and better pricing. This makes cat ownership more attractive and discriminates against dogs (and other consumers of dog food).

Ed wants to end the “pooper-scooper” policy.

“Dogs have a right to poop where they wish without fear of reprisal. I am supported in this by numerous ‘shoe-cleaner’ product manufacturers who have seen their business decline in recent years due to a lack of good quality, well camouflaged dog shit in the streets.

Ed is also looking for “justice for my cousin Spotty Hund” who was kicked in the arse at the back of a pub by a drunk who thought he was a one-eyed monster walking backwards.

Then there is Ed’s call for recognition of the “Gurrier Terrier” (TM) as a recognised pedigree breed with the Irish Kennel Club.

He ends with the impression of a candidate of action. “Must dash, as we are going out looking for the man who shot my Paw.”

Ed is obviously a candidate who knows that politics is to a great extent sniffing around for answers and getting your ass kicked.